Comments on: What Everyone Ought to Know About Conflict Management Skills http://conflictzen.lenski.com/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/ conflict resolution for organizations, teams, executives and managers Thu, 02 Sep 2010 14:57:40 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Dr. Tammy Lenski http://conflictzen.lenski.com/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-144 Dr. Tammy Lenski Sun, 13 May 2007 15:44:18 +0000 http://lenski.com/index.php/2007/04/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-144 Hey there, Claire, it was great to meet and chat with you at SOBCon! I'm already looking forward to next year too. And speaking of nice sites...I was just over at yours and really enjoyed not just the quality information but also the energizing and fun feel to it, not stuffy and self-important the way some PR blogs are. Hey there, Claire, it was great to meet and chat with you at SOBCon! I’m already looking forward to next year too. And speaking of nice sites…I was just over at yours and really enjoyed not just the quality information but also the energizing and fun feel to it, not stuffy and self-important the way some PR blogs are.

]]> By: Claire http://conflictzen.lenski.com/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-143 Claire Sun, 13 May 2007 13:04:21 +0000 http://lenski.com/index.php/2007/04/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-143 Tammy: Your site is beautiful! I love the design. Also, I am planning a difficult conversation of my own and the content on your site is very helpful. I enjoyed meeting you at SOBCon07, and hope to see you again next year. Claire Tammy: Your site is beautiful! I love the design. Also, I am planning a difficult conversation of my own and the content on your site is very helpful. I enjoyed meeting you at SOBCon07, and hope to see you again next year. Claire

]]> By: Dr. Tammy Lenski http://conflictzen.lenski.com/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-139 Dr. Tammy Lenski Fri, 13 Apr 2007 20:10:19 +0000 http://lenski.com/index.php/2007/04/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-139 Shama, thanks for visiting and welcome! As I read your note I got an image of Star Wars and a young Darth Vader in my mind... :) Shama, thanks for visiting and welcome! As I read your note I got an image of Star Wars and a young Darth Vader in my mind… :)

]]> By: Shama Hyder http://conflictzen.lenski.com/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-140 Shama Hyder Fri, 13 Apr 2007 19:38:47 +0000 http://lenski.com/index.php/2007/04/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-140 Tammy. What a great post. As a conflict mediator, this is also a lesson I had to learn. "I will not use my power for evil." = ) Tammy. What a great post. As a conflict mediator, this is also a lesson I had to learn. “I will not use my power for evil.” = )

]]> By: Dr. Tammy Lenski http://conflictzen.lenski.com/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-142 Dr. Tammy Lenski Tue, 10 Apr 2007 11:57:59 +0000 http://lenski.com/index.php/2007/04/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-142 Welcome, Nancy, and thanks for taking the time to leave a comment. It's always nice to meet a new visitor and reader and I hope our paths will continue to cross. Welcome, Nancy, and thanks for taking the time to leave a comment. It’s always nice to meet a new visitor and reader and I hope our paths will continue to cross.

]]> By: NancyCz http://conflictzen.lenski.com/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-141 NancyCz Tue, 10 Apr 2007 01:04:59 +0000 http://lenski.com/index.php/2007/04/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-141 Stumbled upon your site via Christine Kane's blog... looks like something I'll be adding to my list of sites I peruse. I look forward to reading more! Stumbled upon your site via Christine Kane’s blog… looks like something I’ll be adding to my list of sites I peruse. I look forward to reading more!

]]> By: Dr. Tammy Lenski http://conflictzen.lenski.com/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-138 Dr. Tammy Lenski Fri, 06 Apr 2007 15:16:26 +0000 http://lenski.com/index.php/2007/04/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-138 Linda, talking of smart people! You not only noticed that you were setting people up for specific responses, but you then deliberately changed your behavior to improve your interactions. You go, girl! I'm not surprised that you found your interactions improving in the process. Consciously or subconsciously, our antenna tell us when we're being manipulated or set up, even when it's for benign purposes. Most of us don't like it much. So replacing implicit manipulation with true curiosity really changes things. What a gift you've given the people you interact with...and yourself. Linda, talking of smart people! You not only noticed that you were setting people up for specific responses, but you then deliberately changed your behavior to improve your interactions. You go, girl!

I’m not surprised that you found your interactions improving in the process. Consciously or subconsciously, our antenna tell us when we’re being manipulated or set up, even when it’s for benign purposes. Most of us don’t like it much. So replacing implicit manipulation with true curiosity really changes things. What a gift you’ve given the people you interact with…and yourself.

]]> By: Linda Zdanowicz http://conflictzen.lenski.com/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-137 Linda Zdanowicz Fri, 06 Apr 2007 14:48:50 +0000 http://lenski.com/index.php/2007/04/what-everyone-ought-to-know-about-conflict-management-skills/#comment-137 Hi Tammy, I love that story and have found it to be true myself. I don't know if I read it here or in a book but something similar, "When you say or do something with the intention of getting a specific response from the other person, you're not being honest, you're being manipulative." Wow, when I realized how often I was guilty of that, I changed what I did and got much better interactions in the process. I felt as excited as Kate did to find that piece of the communication puzzle. Linda Hi Tammy, I love that story and have found it to be true myself. I don’t know if I read it here or in a book but something similar, “When you say or do something with the intention of getting a specific response from the other person, you’re not being honest, you’re being manipulative.” Wow, when I realized how often I was guilty of that, I changed what I did and got much better interactions in the process. I felt as excited as Kate did to find that piece of the communication puzzle.
Linda

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